OK, not so "fun" this time. But while I'm delighted and relieved by the election of Barack Obama to be our next President, I'm displeased with other voting results of this week and I remain disgusted by the behavior of a lot of people in recent weeks and months. If I may call out a few of them, here are some people who get the Gas Face from me:1. The voters of Arkansas who approved a ballot measure that forbids nonmarried adults living together from being adoptive or foster parents. The ban was specifically aimed at gay men and lesbians. Congratulations, Arkansans, on deciding that a child is better off homeless than in the home of a gay person.
2. The voters of California who said Yes on 8, deciding that gay marriages are sufficiently threatening to their own that they Must Be Stopped Now. Especially of note is a quote from Pam Anderson, an unfortunately named Mormon who, with her husband, donated $50,000 to the ban-gay-marriage cause - because it's for the children!
"It was a decision we made very prayerfully and carefully," said Pam Patterson, 48. "Was it an easy decision? No. But it was a clear decision, one that had so much potential to benefit our children and their children."
Ms. Patterson, fuck you. I hope all five of your sons turn out gay. And proud.
3. The guy who threatened me on Facebook because of a pro-Obama comment I made there. Fucking psycho.
4. Elizabeth Dole, you shameless harridan. Calling your opponent "godless" is low, even for a modern-day Republican. How do you sleep?
5. Michelle Bachmann, you lunatic McCarthyite. Same question. I see that you've been re-elected; so will you now go forward with investigations of your own President?
6. Sarah Palin, I am so very grateful we won't have an End Times dominionist a heart attack away from the presidency.
7. All investment bankers. We made fun of you twerps for spending thousands of your own dollars on the "bottles & models" lifestyle, but we didn't realize how many of OUR dollars you pissed away. Pop those collars, assholes. (And hey, Donald Trump, you fraud, I'll lump you in here too.)
8. The AIG executives who treated themselves to a high-end spa-resort weekend immediatey after the taxpayers bailed out their goddamned company. You're a great symbol of why there's so much distrust right now that the bailout is actually going to help hardworking Americans.
9. Bill O'Reilly, you're another great symbol of all that's wrong today: you and your ilk have poisoned the national dialogue, which is to say that it's no longer a dialogue but people trying to out-bluster each other.
10. And finally, George W. Bush. You illiterate, uncurious hack. You inherited an America that was admired and revered throughout the world, and dissipated every last drop of international goodwill. Start packing, you goddamned power-mad drunk. America will be better off without your misguided influence.
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